


I'm a Fighter

by MutualDaydreamer



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Bisexual Male Character, Bisexuality, Coming Out, Cuban Lance (Voltron), During Canon, Gay, Gay Keith (Voltron), Gay Male Character, Insecure Lance (Voltron), LGBT, Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lance (Voltron)-centric, Love Confessions, M/M, Pining Lance (Voltron), Season/Series 08, Slow Burn, War, klance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-16
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2019-08-02 16:18:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16308551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MutualDaydreamer/pseuds/MutualDaydreamer
Summary: Lance is very insecure as part of Voltron. Not because he doesn't want to be a paladin, but because he feels like he has nothing special to give, except tons of flaws and extra bad jokes. On top, he has feelings for two people at the same time. Not only is that kinda weird, but it also makes him question his whole sexuality. And coming to terms with all this is really hard for him since he never learned how to properly come out to others. Especially if those are the ones that make him feel worthless. Not to mention the next war brewing up.





	1. Chapter 1

My name is Lance McClain. I'm 18 years old and a paladin of Voltron. The red one to be exact.

But who am I fooling? You already know everything about that. At least if you ever paid any attention to me at all. Doesn't matter. Or does it?

As you probably also know I'm the seventh wheel of the team. Wait. I'm not even that, since Romelle, Kosmo and Keith's badass Galra mom joined us. And let's not even start with the space mice and Kaltenecker. Or Kolivan. Well, pretty much every BoM member! Or the MFE pilots and stuff. Any of them would be able to replace me with ease.

For a very short amount of time I didn't think like this. Keith really made me feel vulnerable for a few days. Then he left and took a piece of me with him that hasn't returned since he came back so much different.

Bold of me to assume he meant what he said. Or maybe he did but moved on from that idea since he and the others became stronger in that time. Just not me.

To be honest: I never felt this lonely. Not even trying to light the mood with a dumb joke or something.

Yeah. I was right. It doesn't matter at all. Props to me for being for once, since I'm just the dumb one.

Whatever. Keith killed off Sendak. We kicked that robots ass to Kerberos and back. Earth is safe and the universe isn't in danger. At the moment.

Currently it's the middle of the night. Yet I'm sitting here in this hospital room, rethinking all of my life choices, while I cry like some little baby. Literally my life in a nutshell.

But I don't only cry, because I feel like a burden. There is this other reason. It's a stupid one since there is Shiro, but still. With me, it's something totally different. Maybe they noticed already. I acted like a fool when it came to this enough times already, so it would've been obvious enough. Could be one of the reasons why they treat me like a piece of junk.

What I'm talking about? My straight ass, that apparently isn't that straight after all. Shocking, right? I don't exactly know what changed within me. Well, probably nothing. Just a mechanism, when I realized how hot boys are. As hot as most girls.

Bisexuality lets greet.

The clock on the wall ticks, reminding me of a time bomb or something similar. How am I supposed to live my life like this? I can't just walk to them like: 'By the way, I'm attracted to both genders.' They would only make fun of me. Or telling me to cut out that jokes, because it's not funny to joke about sexuality. You could badly hurt someone's feelings.

Yeah, sounds about right. But it's my own fault. I made a fool out of myself so that nobody takes me quite serious anymore.

Let me continue the list of shitty things. It's nothing new, that I fell hard for Allura. Romelle is wonderful as well.

What? You don't believe me? You got me there. Pidge. Katie. Whatsoever. Yes, definitely her. Still wrong? How about Shiro? No? Hunk? Kaltenecker? ... Ryan? Or perhaps James!? Okay, okay, I surrender.

If someone would've told me I would fall for Keith Kogane one day, a year ago, I would've told them to go search some mental help. Ha, jokes on me for doing so. I did fall for him and his stupid, but most likely ridiculously fluffy mullet. It just kinda started to grow on me.

Possibly I'm not meant to get a happy end. That's what happens when you're not worthy of someone else's love. Sad and true.

All in all my life pretty much sucks. And there is nothing I could do about that.

I get up, because sitting in my bed, crying the whole night is not what I want to do. But I wrap the blanket around my shoulders when I open the balcony door and go out since it's cold outside at night.

Though the stars aren't very clear. So I kinda feel even more lonely than before, but it's quiet at the very least. Huh, not what I wanted.

'Can't sleep?'

My heart almost skips a beat, when I turn around and face Keith, who's standing on the balcony left to mine. His grey purple-ish eyes seem to glow a little in the dark.

'Something like this, I guess. What about you?'

I sincerely hope he can't see, that I just shedded a lot of tears.

He grunts, turning away from me a bit.

'Doesn't really matter. A lot is going on in my head right now.'

'Nothing special after all what happened. The whole war thing and stuff.'

'Maybe so.'

Some minutes of pure silence pass, before he makes a move to go back inside, leaving me behind once again. Yeah, I'm still upset about that.

'Going already? Sorry for being a bad company.'

He hesitates before he faces me again. He's not saying a single word, only shaking his head in disbelief.

'What are you talking about?'

Hearing this sentence from him, I feel thrown back in time. When he gave me that pep talk in his bedroom. You know, that one that made me feel worthy for a couple of days. Not a long time, but long for my conditions. For a second I really think he's still the same on the inside.

His long black hair looks silvery in the moonlight. I like that on him. Especially with that scar on his cheek. He looks like that typical cool Anime protagonist. I wish I could be his sidekick.

'Forget that I said anything. Just ... go inside and sleep or whatever you're doing then.'

'Lance, are you okay?'

'Funny that you ask, since you never seemed to care before.'

I only think that. It wouldn't be fair of me to tell him this. How could I ask him to watch out for me, when I'm not worth it?

I'm nearly tearing up, but I don't want him to see me cry. Aren't my heartstrings tired at some point?

'Look ... er ... I'm not the best with words. And you aren't affected by them anyway. Actions. That's your thing. I really don't know what to say.'

'Cut it out, Keith.'

He remains silent, while his eyes twitch a little. After a while, he opens his mouth again, but when I shoot him a look he closes it.

The idea to confess to him is crossing my mind. Hastily I throw it away before I'm doing something I'm going to regret. How do you confess your love to your former rival anyway? Especially if he's straight. Just saying it. He and Acxa seem to be an actual thing now. Damn.

'...Sorry, I don't do this to be rude to you.'

Keith nods slowly, trying to avoid my stare, which I can not blame him for. I'm acting like a creep for sure. Okay, enough with the self-pity for now.

'What a beautiful night.'

Just like him. Wait. Not now gay thoughts!

A confused look flashes about his pale face, but he's catching himself fast.

'Right, we didn't have this in a long while. Space nights are different from earth nights.'

'Actually I didn't even know, when it was day and when night. I just went to bed, when I was tired. It was always dark outside there.'

I can see the hint of a smile on his lips: 'Copy that.'

It's kinda weird having this kind of small talk with our leader, long past bedtime. I didn't know it could be this easy. We never ever did this before. I like it this way.

Once again we stay silent for a while, but it doesn't give me crazy chills anymore. It more likely makes me feel comfortable, so I can't suppress the urge to smile any longer.

'You know that we all have breakdowns at a point of our lives. I can guarantee you that.'

Keith shouldn't have started with that topic again. My smile fades, just as fast as it came. In exchange, my insecurities come back to me. Moving on would've been too easy. I couldn't just tell him. About all the things that I feel. My devotion to him included.

I shore up on the railing, humming 'Gasolina', while I literally ignore him. Perhaps this is why nobody likes me. So much for the: stop the self-pity. Combing my hair with my fingers, though he shoots me an intense look. My cheeks heat up a little. I pray he won't be able to make this out in the dark.

'Guess you're not in the mood to talk about this, huh?'

'Not really. Sorry.'

'You like to apologize, huh?'

'Sorry.'

He rolls his eyes a little, before answering.

'It's fine. We can just stand here ... and say nothing.'

'Thank you, Keith. I would really appreciate that. I ... I'm probably just tired. But ... you know ... not that kind of fatigue sleep could cure. It's hard to explain.'

'I understand.'

We look at each other without losing any words and I find it funny how all dialogues we did have this night ended like this at some point.

There's just that one thing that disturbs me.

Even if there is just a meter or so that separates us, it feels like he's miles away. I bet this is because he stands above me. Not really complicated. Of course, a leader and the more than seventh wheel, me, aren't on the same wavelength.

How could he ever possibly love me? I'm not lovable at all.

I know that tomorrow I'm going to feel better. I love my friends and all these insecurities are the result of overthinking. The thing is just that once I'm deep enough into it, it's literally impossible for me to stop myself.

'Can you ... er ... come over? I think I need a hug.'

Did I just say this out loud? Someone pull a trigger at me, please. I'll thank you forever.

If Keith is confused or at least surprised he's not showing it.

'You think the nurses would appreciate when I wander through the Garrison hospital in the middle of the night?'

He must have seen the look on my face, because he looks at my balcony, scanning the distance.

'Or do you want me to jump?'

If he fails he's going to fall two storeys deep, so I shake my head. He could get hurt or even worse: die. If he falls wrong. I deeply care about him.

Ha, if that wouldn't have been obvious enough already.

'Er ... it's fine, buddy. Stay where you are. I'm doing great.'

'If you say so.'

I bet he would never hug me anyway. So I can deal with it.

'I ... should go inside. It's a little cold out here. Trying to get a little sleep. Good night, Keith.'

I fake a chuckle, while I turn my back on him.

'Good night, Lance.'

He sounds sad. I tell myself I'm hallucinating.

When the door closes behind me, a single tear rolls down my cheek. I brush it away. I'm not going to end where I started.

Moving on from Allura is already hard enough. Moving on from Keith as well makes everything worse.

Quiznak. Damn. Fuck. Whatever.

Tomorrow is going to be a better day, without war around. I should focus on the good things. There are a lot of those. And maybe we are going to do something fun. Just chilling for a day would be just fine as well. I think we deserve a break after all we did and earth needs some build up. I could do something with my family. Or stick to Ryan, hanging out a bit. Talking and stuff. I lie down in my bed again, slide the blanket off my shoulders and pull it over my legs.

While I'm drifting away a little, still thinking about tons of things, that one thought crosses my mind.

Maybe in the end it does matter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Howdy, my dear fellow readers and thank you for deciding to read the first chapter of my fanfiction. It's my first one in English, that isn't a short (under 1000 words) Oneshot.  
> Yeah, you know, English isn't my first language. That's why my texts might have some mistakes in them. Especially, when it comes to commas. But I'm trying to avoid them as much as possible, by reading over it, after finishing and looking up things I'm not sure about.  
> I have to say I really enjoy to write Langst. Not, because I like to see him suffer. God, no! But, because for me he's a relatable character. And you can't seriously tell me, that he doesn't feel bad at all, being treated like this. Though it's probably not as bad as in this text.  
> 


	2. Chapter 2

I wake up when one of the nurses enters my room and pulls the curtains to the side so that the first thing that happens when I open my eyes is that I'm blinded by the morning sun.

Frick. I feel like I've only slept for five minutes at most, I'm so tired. But that won't stop her from talking insistently to me.

I need some seconds before the memories from last night come back to me and I wonder if it has been a dream because I don't quite wanna believe that I talked to Keith like we're actual friends. Well. Maybe that's formulated a little exaggerated. We just had a little small talk without getting at each other's throat.

'Here's your breakfast. And a little medicine so your bruises will heal a bit faster. But you seem to be pretty fine after all, you'll be able to leave in no time.'

'What about the others?'

'It's the same with them. Except for this boy ... er ... Keith is his name I believe. He's got a nasty wound on the back of his head. We'll have to stitch it if it's not going to be better soon.'

Shit. I didn't even notice. Which might be possible when it was a dream. Now I really believe it was one. What a shame, I could've kissed him without any consequences. Though I bet even dream-Keith would've slapped me for it. Not like I would try in real life, I'm not going to impose myself on him or anybody else. Especially since he's straight 'n stuff.

Ah, great. My weird loverboy side is back. Seems like everything is perfectly back to normal.

'Can I get up?'

'After you ate properly. But don't overexert yourself.'

'Huh, what am I gonna do? Do a marathon?'

'Just don't, okay?'

'Yeah, copy that.'

I choke down the meal since I'm not hungry at the slightest but feel better a little bit after doing so. She gives me a glass of water so I can take the pills that are supposed to help me heal before she finally lets me explore the corridors outside my chamber.

'... can't do this anymore.'

I hesitate, I haven't even moved since I left the room. The door next by stands wide open and I believe it must be Keith's. Seems like that's his voice at least.

'Hey, I understand that. You'll get over it soon enough, you're strong.'

'But it hurts. Fuck I feel so stupid moaning about that, I shouldn't have told you.'

I try to act like I didn't hear a word from the conversation when I walk by. Probably it was about the injury the nurse talked about anyway. What else would make sense at this point?

'It- hold on. I think someone's coming in our direction. Close to passing.'

'Wow, you're paranoid or something? If you don't want people to listen to your guys' discussion then maybe close the door next time.'

Shiro's sitting on the bed with Kosmo on his lap next to Keith who's turning a little paler than he already is. Though I'm possibly hallucinating.

'You ... er ... well. Morning Lance.'

'Morning. Are you okay, buddy? You seem a little irritated.'

'Everything is just fine', Shiro looks at me with a smile on his lips, 'Did you sleep well last night?'

'Wonderful. I had this weird dream last night. It was funny though it wasn't really something out of the ordinary.'

'Oh yeah? What was it about?'

'Doesn't really matter. But Keith was in it! We talked a bit about boring stuff. Felt almost real.'

There goes my urge to tell everyone what I experienced. Not like they would really care but at least they act as they do.

'You sure you dreamt that?'

'Yes. Didn't I just tell you what happened?'

'Right. Very well.'

Shiro shakes his head, facing Keith who bites his lower lip. He whispers something that sounds like 'Fuck' over and over again. Did I say something wrong?

'By the way. Do you guys know in which room Allura lies? I would like to see her.'

Keith shoots me a strange and as well suspicious look, not answering my question. Yet countering with one.

'Why do you ask about her only? What's with Pidge and Hunk?'

Well, he doesn't say this out loud but his grey purple-ish seem to ask this. He's actually right.

'Oh yeah. And the others. What's with them? Are they nearby? I haven't seen Hunk's mom in ages! Her chili con carne is the best! But I believe Hunk could top her if he tried hard enough. But it makes you fart. Ah, yeah. Too much information, sorry guys.'

'I believe he's in the room across from this room. Pidge is in the one left next to his and Allura should be in the one right next to yours. If they didn't move her since yesterday.'

'Thank you, Shiro. We'll see each other later? Discussing what we're going to do from now on? Man, I'm going to miss you guys, I started to get used to being a paladin.'

'I think we all feel like that. Even if the intensity of this feeling varies from person to person.'

'I'll go then. See ya'!'

I turn around, halfway through to corridor on the way to my other crush when the door behind me goes shut. But before that, I imagine hearing Keith crying.

'It's just like the bondi-', his words are cut short by the bang.

I should stop taking that medicine. It makes me believe that there are things that aren't really there. Keith is nobody that just bursts into tears.

Overcoming the last few steps to Allura's chamber only takes seconds. Then I knock.

'Yeah? Come in! Ah, Lance. Good morning.'

She smiles at me and I smile back when I hear the way she pronounces my name. Like a rich person. But my eyes are falling on the flowers that are standing on a little table next to her bed. Those are the ones I asked Veronica to buy for her. And the card with that ludicrous sketch I did is next to the vase. It's cute that she didn't throw them into the trash bin already.

'Did I wake you up?'

'No, you didn't. Don't worry about that.'

A tray with a plate is placed on her legs. On the plate lies a half-eaten sandwich with cheese and cucumber on it. I wonder if it tastes weird to her since she isn't used to earth food at all.

'How does it taste?'

'It's very exotic! I like it.'

Only an alien would come up with the idea to call something this plain exotic. But I have to confess that I think it's really cute. So ... innocent. Though I know how badass she can be.

'That's nice to hear. You mind if I grab a seat?'

'Of course not. Sit down Lance.'

Another smile hushes over her face and for a second I get lost in her eyes. My bisexual ass is freaking overwhelmed. I hope nobody is ever going to make me choose between the two of them.

Ha, silly me. That's not going to happen. Neither Keith nor Allura have any feelings for me. So who fuckin cares!

'You were great in war. Just as everyone.'

Yeah, right. As if.

'Thank you. But you did more than I did.'

'That's not true. We all contributed or part. I'm glad all this is over, Voltron finally brought peace to the universe.'

Personally, I think that this wasn't the last time we fought in an intergalactic war. We thought it was over too many times already. But it perhaps won't hurt to dream.

'Maybe so.'

'Ah, I haven't thanked you for the flowers yet. They are beautiful.'

'I asked Veronica to get some for you but I wasn't sure which you would like so I let her decide. Guess girls know what they are doing with other girls. But boys can't figure out boys. Weird, isn't it? At least I figured roses would be a little corny.'

'Corny? Why are you saying that?'

'On earth they symbolize love. Though agapanthus is the official version of them.'

'Agapanthus?'

'Yeah. Though roses are way more beautiful. And they smell wonderful. I sadly hardly ever had some of them in Cuba. I gave one to my first crush but she thought I was creepy, hit my hand and when I dropped it, she stepped on it.'

'That's a sad story.'

'It is. But I kept the broken rose in a vase until it completely faded away.'

'That sounds like a message of real life.'

'Guess it is. It only hardly survived another week even though I cared a lot about it. Though I was twelve or so.'

Suddenly she leans forward and I lose it when her lips touch my cheek.

'You have a good heart, Lance.'

'D ... did you just ...? Oh my god. I ... er ... have to go. Sorry, I promised to stop by Hunk and Pidge and ... er ... see you later with the others.'

I stutter like an idiot before I literally flee out of the room. I bet my face is red like a ripe tomato and when I shoot a look over my shoulder I run against the doorframe. She seems confused but starts to smile with the hint of a rosy blush on her cheeks.

I'm positive I'm still dreaming. This dream is nice. Though I still act like a fool. Maybe I should go find Keith and kiss him after all. Just once or twice. With all my passion. Nobody would ever find out about that. Or I go back to Allura. Well, why don't I have both?

But maybe I should not. I could talk in sleep and when somebody hears me saying 'Keith, I love you. Kiss me more with this cursed lips!' I'll have a lot to explain. Or worse: my dream turns into one of these strange Harem things Marco used to watch when he was about my age and younger.

Instead, I walk to Pidge's room. Or conversation isn't long because she's with Matt and this alien girl he brought with him. None of us know how her face looks like though. Their dog Baebae is with them as well. So I stop by Hunk's room after only a few minutes.

'Good morning Hunk. Good morning Mrs. Garrett. Good morning Mr. Garrett.'

Mrs. Garrett hugs me all of sudden.

'Lance, I haven't seen you in ages. It's good to see you again my boy. You've grown so much since then.'

She's like a second mother to me. But of course, I like her husband as well. I just don't know if he isn't a little homophobic. He never got that Shiro and his boyfriend Mr. W., who both used to be teachers of mine, were more than good friends. Even though they handled their relationship openly. I should avoid coming out in front of him if ever comes to it.

'Have you found a girlfriend finally my boy?', he smiles at me.

'No.'

'Really? Aren't the girls running after you? Ah, I bet you're still looking for the right one. Since you're such a handsome boy.'

Hunk snorts but it's mixed with his laughter: 'Oh yeah. Totally.'

'Don't worry. The other boys haven't found a girl either have they? And they are all older than you.'

I don't tell them about Shiro. I don't know how they would react.

'Well, Keith is pretty much close to it.'

My best friend looks at me confused: 'Is he?'

'Yeah, he's running after Acxa like some maniac.'

'But ... Wait, Keith isn't-'

'Shocking. I know. That a girl would find a boy attractive that got longer hair than her.'

I shrug, while he bites his lip in disbelief.

'But he's a great leader this Keith. Weren't you boys in the same class at the Garrison?'

'Oh yes we were before he got expelled. Not like he would remember that.'

But I do and he was cute back then. Gosh this mullet on him that he kept. I'll never forget these days. Okay, enough with the gay thoughts for now.

'Yeah, Lance wouldn't shut up about him. Keith this, Keith that. Why do all the chicks like Keith? Keith is such a bad boy. Oh my god, Keith's hair is the worst. I borrowed a pencil from Keith today. Can you believe Keith and I talked today? Keith got expelled. Hasta la later Keith.'

'I-I wasn't like this.'

'Oh, you totally were.'

'Honestly, Lance my dear, I only remember him because you liked to talk a lot about him.'

Oh shit. I was already hella bisexual back then. For Keith as well.

'Doesn't matter anymore. What's in the past is in the past.'

'Right. Now you talk about Allura the whole time.'

'This beautiful white-haired girl with you? Is she someone you like?', Mr. Garrett asks with interest.

'Yes, she and one other person.'

'Do I know the other girl? Is it that small one? Or perhaps this other alien? The blonde one I mean.'

'No, none of them.'

'Then this woman with the purple skin? She seems to be very strong and independent.'

I almost choke at this statement. She doesn't know a thing.

'What? She's Keith mum! This would be absolute weird.'

'Oh, she looks really young for being the mother of a grown up.'

We talk about two hours about stuff though Mrs. Garrett keeps asking me about my other crush while Hunk looks like he knows what's on. After ten more hugs, we run out of things to chitchat about so we say goodbye to each other and I decide to go back to my room.

One of the nurses opened the balcony door for ventilating and I step outside, enjoying the fresh air and silence.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see some movement so I turn to the left to face Keith once again. Yeah, this is definitely some dream. We stare at each other and I have to swallow because when the sunlight hits him like this he looks even more pretty. Bisexuality lets greet. Again.

But before I can say a single word to him he turns his back on me and walks back inside.

'Hey, wait-'

Did he notice that I checked him out? He literally slammed the door shut so I guess he did and is now pretty pissed at me for doing so. He's probably okay with LGBTQ's as long as they don't hit on him. And of course, he never had this problem with Shiro.

I can hear him yelling loud: 'Nothing is alright, I can't do this shit with him any longer! He just won't get it!'

What the quiznak is his problem?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys and thanks for the mountain of positive feedback!  
> I was surprised at how fast I gained Kudos even though this is my first English fanfiction. Well, if we don't count my Klance fanfiction 'Honey you've got no Brain at all' that I run next by. Also, thank you for the comment that was positive as well.  
> I don't have much more to say. I hope you enjoyed the chapter just like the one before. I hope we'll see each other again in the near future!


	3. Chapter 3

Dumbfounded I return to my room. I hate that I don't know why he's so angry at me. I don't think it was only because I checked him out. What did I do wrong this time? Why can't I understand him? Not even a little?

I shake my head and am suddenly pissed at him. Yeah, I love Keith but I feel like he's the one that contributes the biggest part to me feeling worthless. Since he kinda left me behind back then. Frick, I'm about to cry out of anger.

Biting my lip I look around the room before I sit down on my bed again and pull the blanket over my legs. Tons of my thoughts cross my mind and I wonder if it isn't maybe my own fault that he abandoned me like this. After all, I wasn't always that nice to him and almost instantly my anger vanishes.

'Hey, Lance, are you coming?'

I shriek when these words reach me out of sudden.

'Pidge, can't you knock? You almost scared me to death!'

'Oh, I did but you didn't answer. Deep in thought, huh? You screamed like a little girl.'

'Haha, not funny. What do you want?'

'We're all meeting in the sitting room in five minutes.'

'Fine, I'm coming. Don't make a fuss about this shizzle.'

I sincerely hope she doesn't have a recording of me howling like some baby. But that doesn't matter anyway since we're more or less in a little hurry. So I follow her to the sitting room, where Hunk and Shiro are already waiting, chitchatting a little about unimportant things. Coran, Romelle and Krolia are there as well. Some patients around us are doing the same or are playing board and card games.

'Hey guys. So we're talking about what we're going to do now that earth is safe?'

More or less I add in my mind since there's still this tingle in my stomach that tells me this isn't over yet. That robot thingy didn't just appear out of nowhere. I might be dumb but I still figured this.

'Yeah, when Keith and Allura join us we can start', Shiro doesn't even look at me but greets Pidge when she sits down next to Hunk.

Okay, what the fuck is going on here? Did they conspire against me? Or is it just him and Keith?

'Sorry I'm late paladins. Have you been waiting for long?'

I didn't forget about the kiss on the cheek and probably blush with a smile on my lips when she decides to take the seat next to mine: 'No it's fine you're still on time.'

'Well not exactly. You're a minute late princess but that's alright'

Coran twirls his mustache. Looking around the room.

'But where is Keith? He's still not here even though this conversation was his idea.'

The second he finishes he enters the room with Kosmo by his side and just because I'm still a little furious I start to snap at him: 'Where have you been? You kept all of us waiting.'

'Oh, so it's no problem that Allura is late but when it's me it is?', he bares his teeth and the others shoot me some intense looks. Especially his mom and Shiro seem to be annoyed at my statement.

'No, it's because you're our leader. You can't seriously expect us to be on time but not be able to be so yourself. Especially after you just ran away from me. Again!'

It's way too silent in here after these words and I regret ever speaking up. Did I hurt his feelings? Well, he hurt mine but that makes nothing better at all.

'Whatever', he turns his back on me and literally sits down on Shiro's freaking lap. Only Allura squeezing my shoulder keeps me from muttering an insulting comment. She places her head on it after it which my other crush seems to ignore on purpose. 

Yeah, fuck you too, mullet! Go run to your stupid Acxa or so. He acts like we never had a bonding moment.

Wait, that was me not him. Though he's still acting like some little kid that didn't get what he wanted. Why am I in love with him? I suddenly can't remember.

The discussion starts with him speaking up, saying a couple words about the war and how we've all fought well but now we've got to figure out our next steps. Building up the earth is the number one priority of course.

At some point Coran interrupts him and so he remains silent.

'I've got some exciting news to share. Today there is going to be a big feast in town to celebrate your victory over the Galra.'

A party, huh? As if I need to meet another person I could fall for. On the other side, this could distract me from my two current crushes. I planned to move on from them long enough. It's time to do something about it.

'And they insist that everyone comes who fought in the war', he completes when Keith makes a move to open his mouth, perhaps to reject the invitation.

'We don't have the right clothes to show up to such a thing.'

'You will get clothes provided. Anything else?'

'Guess we have no other choice than going.'

'Seems like it. You're also allowed to bring a partner. Except for family members. They can come with you as well. Maybe you should get a bit sleep until the.. er ... sun sets.'

'Great idea, Coran'; I get up before anybody can say a word and leave the room. I'm frickin tired because I hardly slept at all with all this overthinking and that nurse waking me up that early in the morning. Guess that stuff wasn't a dream after all.

That's the moment when I turn around just to walk back in: 'Hey, Keith? Can I talk to you? In private.'

He grunts, gets up and follows me in the floor, followed by Kosmo and I'm suddenly sure that I know why he's angry at me.

'So?'

'Sorry for thinking that our talk last night was a dream. It was just too weird.'

'Yeah, whatever. I don't really care about that.'

'What? But why are you mad with me then?'

'I'm not', we walk up the stairs next to each other, though he doesn't look at me. I admire his mullet meanwhile and wonder if his pale skin is soft or rough. My mood when I'm around him changes faster than the weather in April.

'Of course you are. You halfway ignore me since I left your room this morning. Whatever it is this time: I'm sorry.'

'You really think so?', he turns around so out of sudden that I almost trip and fall down the stairs to my death.

'Yeah, I don't want to fight with you, buddy.'

'That's not what I mean.'

'Huh? What are you talking about?'

'It doesn't matter.'

Once again he turns his back on me and hurries to his room but this time I run after him.

'Hey, wait and talk to me.'

He stops when I grab his wrist. He might be the better pilot but I'm the faster runner. I imagine that there is some pain in his eyes.

'Do you really believe that I ran away from you?'

I'm speechless and let go his wrist.

'Well ... yes.'

Keith slams shut the door in front of my nose and I sigh. Kosmo barks at me before he disappears. He can be so stubborn but I can't even be angry at him for being so because I just said something hurtful. At least he didn't slap me.

'Do you guys have an argument again?'

'Guess so. I think he's very pissed at me.'

I turn around to face Allura who must have decided to go after us.

'What's the reason for it?'

'I shouldn't have said that he ran away. I think that scratched at his ego.'

'I can still hear you, Lance!'

'Ah, right. Sorry for that.'

A second later I believe that he fled to the balcony. Seems to be his new sanctuary.

'I hope you get along with each other soon enough.'

'I hope so too. After all we've been through together. I thought we would be friends by now. Guess we're only teammates.'

'I believe that you are friends having a little problem with coming along.'

And on top, I'm in love with him even though he strongly dislikes me. And if that wouldn't be enough already he's straight. Life isn't fair. Guess it never is.

'Yeah. I'll go to my room now. Getting a little sleep.'

'See you then, Lance', she kisses me on the cheek. Again.

'L-later!', I stumble to my room, grabbing the fabric of my shirt right where my heart is. Jeez, it feels good to be alive. But I probably shouldn't get my hopes up. She's just trying to be nice because she's a gorgeous person. That's all.

Kissing people on the cheek doesn't have to be romantic. I and my sibling did it all the time when we were much younger.

Now I'm hugging my pillow, rolling over my bed like some lunatic. She's so great. And beautiful and strong. Just so ... perfect!

For some seconds I'm able to forget about Keith. Not everything has to be about him. I mean I'm hella bisexual for him, he's one of my three worlds, but I have a life that doesn't contain him as well.

Okay, I really should try to sleep now. But that kiss makes me be so excited! My cheeks feel like they are on fire. But it feels damn good. For once I feel a little bit loved.

I get up running through the little room, tripping over a chair that stands next to the bed. When I get close to the balcony door I can see Keith who looks like he's about to cry. But he would run inside as soon as I would go out there. I feel sorry for him. It's once again my fault that he feels miserable.

Shit. I shouldn't overthink again. Before I get too much into it! Sleep. Frickin sleep!!!

I jump on the bed, throw the blanket over my head and scream. Loud. Keith might've heard it. After that, I put the pillow where it belongs.

Lucky me (for fucking once!) I fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow.

Ha, nightmares. Nice to see you again my old friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here I am yet again with another chapter of 'I'm a Fighter'!  
> And what else could I say except 'Thank you' over and over again?  
> The Kudos literally exploded after only two chapters. At least for my conditions. I hope you liked this one. In a week I sadly won't update that often anymore because my exams are starting. So I will only be able to update once a week. Or maybe not even that. I hope you understand.  
> See ya'!


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